Small or Far Away, Father Dougal on Cows
I’m thinking it’s about time for a song!
…Not the horse song….?
No, no, a new song!
By Howard Jones?
No, by me. Well, lyrics by me, music by some other un-credited band
Like the horse song!
Quiet and listen:
Where have all the rookies gone?
Long time passing.
Where have all the rookies gone?
Long time ago
Where have all the rookies gone?
Popped their bubbles every one.
When will they ever return?
When will we ever learn?
Yeah, lack of downgrade targets.
I made a rule about not wasting them, and now I look back and wish I had not been timid about taking Stack and Lockheart. Now there are ripe cows, waiting for harvest, and I am off in Moo-ron Pastures, wishing I’d followed my own advice.
Indeed. Well, best thing to do go on and talk about something else. Like, for example, my new cunning plan for how to approach the early season.
Which is now past. Good timing!
Nah, well, mostly nah. I mean it would have been better to think of it sooner, but still time left.
Does this new cunning plan have a name?
Not yet. Some sort of cow related one eventually. For, I’m calling it “Go Cow or Go home, mostly.”
You’re mostly calling it that, or the mostly is part of the name?
Mostly is part of the name. Lemme explain:
Until your team has no cows on the field, all trades should involve at least one cow.
Oh great, you baffled the hamster!
And that is hard….?
Right, of course it is. Sorry.
So, seriously. It distills all the advice about how not to mess up early into one simple idea. You downgrade fat cows to thin cows. You upgrade fat cows to keepers. And nothing else. Well, close to nothing else?
You had me at “distilled”
Wait what about injuries?
That would be the “almost” part. If you have a non cow get hurt, you can certainly trade them if you want to.
But, what about the time honored tradition of correctional trades?
Nope. I mean if you feel you must, fine, but really, try to have none. Throw off your mental chains! The more I think about it, the more I think correctional trades are high risk and not worth the reward. When they go wrong they really go wrong. And trades are useful, and not using them when you do not need to means you have them when you do need to.
I’d also note that any player scoring like a keeper should not be considered a cow, at least until their bye. The idea is to improve the part of the team where you get the most improvement, and that is low scoring cow to keepers, and only when that is all done go to high scoring cows to keepers. Or sideways trades. We really don’t know who we are going to want at the end of the season until at least 1/3 of the way through, and even then a lot of players are going to fall off, and not be worth bringing in, and a lot of players are going to step up and finish far better than they started. Schwarzwalder did a very clever trade talk review, and look at how so much of what people really wanted to do has turned out less then well.
Well, I will say one thing about that.
Far more clear then whatever Zen stuff you were babbling about last week!
Collins – Pick any of his previous scores. He could score that again any week. So ready to be traded.
Scrimshaw – Came back, and manged a decent score before having to leave due to migraine. Darn. And wow that must have been seriously painful! Beats a lot of other things, but still. Owch. Keep hold, whatever.
Hore – Still growing. He is twenty three and may be able to keep this up. I mean, wow. So do not trade him out before his bye.
Clark – Nice time to put up his highest score so far. Holding for two weeks would be fine now, Not tragic if you need to cash him in , but there are a lot of other defenders who should go first.
Duursma – Sort of done, but he does play the Suns next. Best chance of a high score he will have all season. Wait a week and hope? I am.
Wilke – Could go, anytime
Moore – Well, his 66 was disappointing against the Blues. Numbers say he can go. I don’t feel like he is ready to though.
Ridley – Did not play
Rozee – Looks like he is done.
Walsh – Well, he has slowed down, but Tim Kelly slowed down last season and then punished those of us who traded him out. Of course Kelly was older. I am still planning to keep him to his bye. He can’t be the person most in need of replacing on most teams.
Constable – I’m not going to and do not need to discuss the “fun” involving him last week. (Mutters things not suitable for a family site) He scored well, and has more money to make.
Butters – Did not play
Atkins – Wow, that 12 pushes him to the front of the line, ready to go through the doors of the place of happy release. Sad after that nice 87!
Cousins – Came back and did well enough to make him worth keeping a bit longer. Not that there is anyone to downgrade him to anyways!
Bailey Smith – Blah score, time to go.
Gibbons – He is still done barring another miracle, and there was none last week. Hold not your breath for one this week.
Stack– Happily he goes, not caring at all about the lack of downgrade options. Hold at least another week.
Ross – Oh, fiddlesticks! And other words that start with F. I see I messed up his sheet, but really, it matters not. He will not be back until R15 or more and can be traded anytime. At least he won’t be a surprise in if you use him as a loophole.
Lockheart – Wow, two good scores in a row. Go him. I mean, keep him. Do not go him, hold him for at least another week and maybe more.
Hayes – So far he is exactly the slow but steady type we expected. I will be happy if he just keeps his job and averages 55.
O’Brian – Ruck Cow! Whoo hoo. Gonna make more cash, doing well. I’m just gonna say that every week until I don’t.
Drew – Also plays the Suns next week, like Duursma. I guessing it is because they are on the same team. Hold a week?
Parker – Stick a fork in him. That 25 will slow or stop his growth for too long to make him a good hold.
Setterfield – Do people still own him? If so I guess keep holding.
Miers – Man I am sad to have missed him. Was there anyone who saw this coming and said so?
Petruccelle – Again, I can just say “See Gibbons.”
Balta – He might end up the poster child for holing cows who start off badly. Would not have been worth a trade to get rid, so hold and hope. Rule about that somewhere…..
Baker – Somehow a mere 72 is disappointing. Still looks a hold to his bye.
Remember, all predictions wrong or triple your money back!
The Horse Song. Ted and I made a Video! (Apparently they are obligatory.)
Thanks for Reading!
Leave a comment / Scroll to bottom