Round 12 Review

Written by Thommo on June 13 2017


Wognuts had a slightly quiet second bye round but he continues to lead the race for the Catta and Ratticus sponsored Group Prize. Jataal is not far behind while Huttabito continues his charge for the top!

Great to see a few of the regulars (and Hutta of course) up there.

Wognuts@SCT Stephen 25790 137
Jobe robbed@SCT Jataal 25691 247
Mumma’s bois@SCT Huttabito 25675 274
No Worries@SCT Timothy 25593 451
WeDoNotForgive@SCT Jeremy 25580 495

Please note that I am only listing the teams from the group with @SCT because only they are eligible for the overall prize!


Last week, we Supercoaches voted for:

5 – Patrick Dangerfield: 5 votes for 3 straight weeks.

4 – Joel Selwood: The late season beast has awoken.

3 – Dustin Martin: Only Danger has done more in the last 3 weeks.

2 – Josh Kelly: Can you believe these are his first votes!

1 – Adam Treloar: Is the revival real?

The top half of the leaderboard stands as follows:

Player Total Votes
1 Patrick Dangerfield 22
2 Rory Sloane 13
3 Adam Treloar 12
4 Tom Rockliff 11
5 Joel Selwood 10
6 Scott Pendlebury 9
7 Dustin Martin 9
8 Marcus Bontempelli 6
9 Gary Ablett 5
10 Luke Dahlhaus 5
11 Sam Docherty 5
12 Lance Franklin 5
13 Rory Laird 5
14 Nic Newman 5
15 Nick Riewoldt 5

So who did you like in Round 12?

Supercoach Talk Champion 2017, Round 12 (5 choices)

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A few – or a lot – of weeks ago, someone (I think it was the Bearded Burbler) mentioned including American Presidents in my reviews.

Considering American politics is such a great source of entertainment, how could I refuse? I’m sorry if there is a strong focus on a certain President, but he was just so stupid…

SYDNEY 12.16 (88) def WESTERN BULLDOGS 6.6 (42)

”There’s an old saying in Tennessee — I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can’t get fooled again.”

President George W. Bush, Sept. 17, 2002

So presidential!

After being made to look like fools by the Dogs for the last few seasons, Longmire finally discovered the formula for defeating them: Win the contested ball and shut down the Dogs’ quick ball movement. JJ barely troubled the scorers and the Bont found life difficult with constant body pressure.

The Dogs never really troubled Sydney and you have to wonder if the extended 2016 season is now starting to take its toll on the young Bulldogs squad.

Sydney are still a long way back but perhaps they are finally ready to make their charge?


Isaac Heeney (Syd) 131 – He started with a bang and despite slowing he still racked up 31 possessions at 80% DE with half of his touches being contested. Only his Glandular Fever in the preseason prevented every coach owning him this season.

Jack Macrae (WB) 123 – For a while there Macrae was on track for a perfect game with 100% DE. Still 32 possessions at 87% DE was handy in a struggling side.

Tom Papley (Syd) 121 He’s an angry little man and he’s almost more important to the Swans’ forward line than Buddy… at a fraction of the price tag!

Caleb Daniel (WB) 115 – The only player in the AFL who can rove the ball without bending over. He’s looking due for a 2018 breakout so if he keeps his forward eligibility he may be worth a punt.

Luke Parker (Syd) 108 – Finally: A sign of life! I’m not sure his 23 possessions, 8 tackles and 1 goal was enough to tempt me to pick him up.


Jason Johannisen (WB) 21 – Hand back that Norm Smith, JJ! 9 possessions: Disgraceful! So much can change in 8 months!

Champion Data (Again) – So Bontempelli scores 92 points from 18 possessions at 39% DE, 11 tackles, 6 marks and 6 clangers while JPK scores 101 points from 37 possessions at 57% DE, 2 marks, 3 tackles and 7 clangers.


ADELAIDE 16.15 (111) def ST KILDA 7.12 (54)

”For seven and a half years I’ve worked alongside President Reagan. We’ve had triumphs. Made some mistakes. We’ve had some sex…uh…setbacks.”

President George H.W. Bush, in 1988

Like father, like son…

In the preseason, the Saints were voted the “team most likely to succeed in 2017” but after yet another setback they seem a long way from living up to the preseason hype. Despite keeping Rory Sloane quiet, they were cut apart by the Crows’ slick ball movement and find themselves outside the top 8 and seemingly with an unhealthy reliance on Nick “No Knees” Riewoldt.

On the other hand, Adelaide sit comfortably in the top 4 even if they still seem to be a midfielder short when playing with the big boys.


Rory Laird (Ade) 134 – A tale of two Rory’s. One went whooshka with 34 possessions at 85% DE and didn’t get tagged. Can you guess which Rory I’m talking about?

Tom Lynch (Ade) 116 – It was a great week for Tom Lynch’s. Unlike the Rory’s, they both smashed out tonnes!

Brodie Smith (Ade) 114 – You know what, let’s poll this performance.

What do we think of Brodie?

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Jack Billings (StK) 106 – Now that we have all traded him out, Billings decided to find consistency. Yet another tonne, all the more impressive given how badly the Saints sucked.

Jack Newnes (StK) 105 – In AFL Fantasy (yes, I know some of you consider that a dirty word) Newnes is a defender once more. Sadly, in SC he’s not a defender and not really relevant.


Rory Sloane (Ade) 66 – Can anyone please tell me the point of tagging a player while the rest of the team smashes you. Even though I don’t own Sloane, this kind of practice disgusts me.

Jack Steele (StK) 53 and Koby Stevens (StK) 55 – I like to divide taggers into two groups, the Creepy Crowleys and the Scooters. The Creepy Crowley’s scrag, hold and irritate gun players while producing next to nothing for their team while the Scooters go head-to-head and win plenty of the ball themselves while also shutting their opponent out of the game.

Take a guess which class, Steele and Stevens are in?

Jack Steven (StK) 73 – What happened to Steven? This season he is only averaging 89 points per match with another shocker on Friday night due to his 33 possessions running at a 48% DE.

Dylan Roberton (StK) 83 – A lot of coaches brought Roberton in this week and would have hoped for more than 83 points. He still gathered 25 possessions but they were mostly uncontested and only 60% effective.

GOLD COAST 13.17 (95) def HAWTHORN 12.7 (79)

”Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?”

—George W. Bush, Jan. 11, 2000

George W: The gift that keeps on giving.

After the Hawks’ have enjoyed the rub of the green with the umpires over the last 2 seasons, Clarko had the audacity to criticize the umpires. Maybe if the Hawks had played for more than just the fourth quarter they may have had a chance, Clarko!

For three quarters, the Suns dominated possession and were only held back by their own skill errors as Ablett ran free, Stevie May marked and spoiled ever Hawthorn forward foray and 2m Peter dominated the airways.

At least the Hawks’ kiddies is finally learning…


Garry Ablett (GC) 146 – Ablett loves playing the Hawks. Who else gives him his own Sherrin to run around with? 37 possessions and 2 goals is just the start?

Jack Gunston (Haw) 121 – After some (stupid) members of the media tried to put Gunston on the trade block during the week, he responded with 19 possessions, 12 marks and 5 goals. Jack Gunston says: “Screw you, Tim Watson!”

Tom Mitchell (Haw) 113 – Here’s clear proof that Champion Data rates an Ablett possession more than a Tom Mitchell possession. For Titchell, 39 possessions equals only 113 points.

Jarrod Witts (GC) 107 – Witts isn’t the best tap ruckman around but he’s still making his coaches happy with another 17 possessions and 46 hit-outs.

Jarryd Lyons (GC) 106 – How many damn ways can you spell Jarryd? Believe me, that is the most relevant point about this score!


I don’t think there are too many SC relevant players who failed in this match but let me know who burnt you.

Brandon Matera (GC) 65 – So who actually owns Matera? With 2 goals, 4 behinds in game 100, perhaps it is time to cut your losses?

Jarryd Roughead (Haw) 74 – Roughie has certainly got his fitness back, gathering heaps of the ball but he gave most of them back with poor DE (52% DE) and 4 clangers.

BRISBANE 18.13 (121) def FREMANTLE 9.10 (64)

‘I’ve now been in 57 states — I think one left to go.”

Barack Obama, at a campaign event in Beaverton, Oregon, May 9, 2008

Count the stars, buddy!

Considering Hawaii was named the 50th state in 1959, maybe Obama needed a geography lesson or just an atlas. Or maybe he’s from the future when America has invaded South America, adding 7 states, and he travelled back in a time machine?

Ross Lyon may want to borrow that time machine so he can go back and stop the plane flying the Dockers to Brisbane. Embarrassingly Fremantle were smashed soundly by the Lions, the first time that had happened in years, and the Dockers have now slumped to 3 straight losses.

And nobody is sad about that except Huttabito!

Still it’s nice to see the Lions grab their second win for the season.


Dayne Beams (Bri) 146 – Did anyone else trade Beams to Rockliff 4-5 weeks ago? I feel remorse. Can someone please tell Beams to stop racking up 36 possessions and 9 clearances every bloody week now?

Dayne Zorko (Bri) 129 – The Magician was at it again with 30 possessions and 2 goals although 5 clangers prevented him from outscoring Beams.

Lachie Neale (Fre) 125 – After a down week, and a slow start, Lachie gathered 32 possessions at 81% DE and 1 goal. Like Zorko, 5 clangers also cost him but his coaches will be happy with anything over 100 points after last week’s debacle.

Stefan Martin (Bri) 112 – Ooooh, a good Stef score with Archie in the side. Stef gathered 22 possessions at 82% DE so he scored well despite only 26 hit-outs. Has he turned the corner in dealing with his sharing difficulties or was his score inflated by the rare Lions’ victory?

Lewis Taylor (Bri) 110 – Remember when Taylor won the Rising Star award? And then he promptly lost any semblance of form? Well, he appears to be flourishing again under Chris Fagan’s reign, kicking 4 goals and giving 4 goal assists this week.


Cam McCarthy (Fre) 21 – Yep, he was worth the wait for the Dockers. 5 possessions and 1 goal. Magical!

Stephen Hill (Fre) 60 – While his brother Brad was everywhere, Stephen Hill was rarely sighted with just 14 possessions at 57% DE and 1 goal.

Nat Fyfe (Fre) 81 – So what is wrong with Fyfe? Finally he seemed to be having a good match at half-time but he disappeared after half-time. It certainly didn’t help that he is the clanger king this season, with 4 clangers from just 18 touches on Saturday.

ESSENDON 19.17 (131) def PORT ADELAIDE 8.13 (61)

”They misunderestimated me.”

—President George W. Bush, Nov. 6, 2000

Who voted for this muppet?

With Port being in red-hot form, Essendon were seriously misunderestimated and they reminded us that, on their day, they can play some seriously good footy.

From go to woe they ran rings around Port Adelaide and have kept their dreams of playing finals alive. They were certainly well served by 5 first half goals to Cale Hooker and a dominant midfield display.

Meanwhile, Port Adelaide remain an enigma: They promise so much but they still can’t break into the upper echelon of the ladder.


Cale Hooker (Ess) 140 – 5 goals (in the first half), 1 goal assist and 4 contested marks certainly scores well, especially with 0 clangers.

Zach Merrett (Ess) 135 – Will anyone ever pay Merrett any attention as he runs around gathering possessions at will. Another 38 possessions and 1 goal this week. I’m sorry, did we yet again question Merrett’s value in the preseason?

Justin Westhoff (Por) 133 – The Hoff does this some weeks: Should we consider him or is he just at the peak of his personal rollercoaster?

Jobe Watson (Ess) 122 – 30 possessions, 9 clearances and 1 goal as we receive another glimpse of 2012. Vintage Jobe but not really SC relevant.

Michael Hurley (Ess) 118 – Hurley played a SC-friendly role rebounding off half-back (8 times) and gathered plenty of the ball (25 possessions). With Hartley standing Charlie Dixon, nobody was really keeping Hurley honest.


Charlie Dixon (Por) 41 – After a big match against the Hawks, Dixon crashed back to earth with a 7 possession and bagel goal match.

Hamish Hartlett (Por) 49 – Normal programming returned this week with Hartlett again stinking it up. Maybe he should have departed Alberton over the off-season?

Jaspar Pittard (Por) 68 – Get a haircut punk! Supercoaches, just don’t ever consider the hippy for your backline!

CARLTON 10.11 (71) def GWS 9.16 (70)

“I was down there, and I watched our police and our firemen, down on 7-Eleven, down at the World Trade Center, right after it came down.”

– POTUS Donald Trump


Just like the Don who got a bit lost when discussing the tragic 9-11, the Giants seem to lose their way whenever they travel to Melbourne, having lost their last 3 matches down south. There have been fewer bigger upsets in 2017 than Carlton upstaging the Giants at Etihad on Sunday even if it had little effect on the Giants’ overall ladder position.

Kreuzer dominated in game 150, Docherty distributed off half-back, Murphy racked them up in the midfield and the Blues’ defenders destroyed the Giants’ forwards.

The Giants were certainly feeling the loss of their many injured stars and inaccurate goal–kicking  cost them but the Blues’ fans will be ecstatic about what the future holds.

Thommo’s Official Apology

I would like to sincerely apologize to Liam Jones (100) for doubting his ability after his stellar effort against the Giants. He was just playing at the wrong end of the ground! In defence he gathered 8 marks, at least half intercepts, and 16 one percenters. In fact, 4 clangers prevented an even greater score!


Sam Docherty (Car) 144 – If you’re serious about Supercoach, you need Doc. 35 possessions and 12 marks. SC Beast!

Matthew Kreuzer (Car) 132 – In game 150, Kreuz was like another midfielder with 21 possessions, 12 contested, 6 marks, 1 contested, 8 tackles and 1 goal to go with his 33 possessions. He may well become the #1 Ruckman but can we finally trust his body?

Dylan Shiel (GWS) 122 – This may be his best match for the season with 32 possessions, 8 clearances and 2 goals. A pity he had little help. That is, a pity if he wanted the Giants to win!

Lachie Whitfield (GWS) 117 – Yet again, Whitfield tried to repay the faith with a great performance of 29 possessions at 82% DE, 10 marks and 1 goal. And again, nobody cares except in Draft Leagues.

Callan Ward (GWS) 112 – If anyone held him, this was what you were waiting for even if he was a bit light on contested ball again with only 9 of his 26 possessions in a contest. He did manage a respectable 7 clearances, 1 goal and 1 goal assist.


Patrick Cripps (Car) 70 – I really want to trade Cripps in but even with the bye, he’s still not producing his 2016 numbers. Can he regain his form this season or should we wait until next year?

Jeremy Cameron (GWS) 50 – Key position forwards: You can’t trust them!

Zach Williams (GWS) 63 – Gee, you give the guy a wrap and he repays you with this tripe! 18 possessions, mostly uncontested, at 66% DE!

MELBOURNE 18.14 (122) def COLLINGWOOD 15.10 (100)

‘A zebra does not change its spots.”

—Al Gore

He certainly looks intelligent.

Love them or hate them, the Pies can play some good footy, but the only constant for them is their inconsistency. And the Queen’s Birthday clash was no different.

Like Al Gore said; some things never change. Well, he tried to anyway.

The Pies dominated early, kicking 6 unanswered goals to start the second quarter to open up a 29 point lead. The Dees pulled that back to 23 points at half-time but they looked in trouble. As has occurred so often, the Pies’ midfield was a well-oiled machine for a half.

And then the Pies seemed to forget how to play football. The Dees evened the contest around the ball and the Pies started making errors, culminating in Melbourne kicking 6 goals to 2 in the third quarter and charging back in to the contest.

Is it a coach problem, a team mentality problem or are the Pies just not that good?

Whatever the reason for the inconsistency, Bucks had better find a solution soon or he can kiss September goodbye.

And for those long-suffering Dees supporters? They move into the top 8 and Maxy is not far away from a return!


Jeremy Howe (Col) 125 – 22 possessions, 10 marks with 5 of those contested and a possible mark of the year contender. Yep, not a bad afternoon. One of the few times – very few – the Jeremy Howe owners don’t regret taking him ahead of Adams.

Brodie Grundy (Col) 116 – No Cox and Brodie’s a happy boy. The only concerning factor is that 19 possessions, 53 hit-outs, 11 tackles, 5 clearances, 4 marks (2 contested) and 1 goal assist only added up to 116 points. Does Brodie need to work on his tap-work?

Nathan Jones (Mel) 110 – Only the 23 possessions, 12 tackles and 2 goal assists but Jones was rewarded for only committing 1 clanger.

Clayton Oliver (Mel) 107 – It’s crazy how consistent Oliver is, averaging 112 points per match and rarely playing a stinker in 11 matches. He gathered another 26 possessions, 16 contested, and 8 clearances on the big stage and he really needs to have a chat to Fyfe about how to play footy!

Adam Treloar (Col) 107 – Anything over 100 points is a blessing for Treloar. This makes it 4 straight tonnes for Treloar and his average is back up to 106 points per week. Not quite what he cost, but he’s getting there!


Jordan Lewis (Mel) 34 – I barely saw him on field so I had to check if he was injured but his 14 possessions came from 82% TOG. This was not what the Dees expected when they gave Lewis a 3 year contract!

Taylor Adams (Col) 68 – Adams still found the ball 26 times, 11 contested, but a 57% DE and 4 clangers cost him. He’s been so good his year I’m sure his owners will forgive him!

Michael Hibberd (Mel) 83 – I know, this is hardly a tragedy but apart from a great late spoil, Hibberd disappeared after being on 54 points at half-time.

And a parting thought from the eloquent George W:

”Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.”

—President George W. Bush, Aug. 5, 2004


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22 thoughts on “Round 12 Review”

  1. Excellent write up as always mate. It really was an entertaining round of footy, even if it went for nearly a week.

    I’m curious about how many of Grundy’s hit outs were to advantage. Watching the match, seemed like the majority were being picked off by Dees. Especially the second half.


    1. Yes, this isn’t Grundy’s first unexpectedly low score due to a low hit-out to advantage rate.

      I wish the herald sun would start releasing the hit-out rate online.


  2. Spot on with the Saints. Five goals to one down at qtr time……maybe they should’ve tried winning the ball instead of just stopping the Crows? And they’re supposed to be challenging for a finals spot?
    In hindsight, keeping Beams and trading Fyfe after Rd8 would’ve been a genius move but who would’ve had the cajones for something like that?
    Superb write-up as always, Thommo!


  3. Magnificent. After Sunday’s game, in a whiskey-induced haze, I remember thinking “cannot wait to read Thommo’s summary of that game next week!”


  4. Great stuff Thommo giving us a laugh first thing in the morning!

    Now as embarassing as it is i have to confess i still own Matera and , he will escape the chop again due to needing an extra body on the field this week. Luckily his score did not count.

    Surely against the Blues he will get an 80 odd , but thats probably wishful thinking.


    1. The Matera selection was a bit like trading in Zaharakis last season. A decision that continues to punish you all year.

      The Blues defence seems to be clicking so I don’t know if he’s guaranteed a big score this week.


  5. Essential Monday (or Tuesday) morning public transport read. It amazes me how you never fail to deliver week in/week out Thommo.

    I’m not sure what’s worse, being a Freo supporter this weekend or the fact I wasn’t even remotely surprised we managed to fluff it up so bad. Thankfully the season that it is the shame is spread out across many teams on a weekly basis and GWS copped some of it too.


  6. Watched the game intently as I had 5 playing.

    I’m sure many Grundy taps were directly to Demons players. These are minus 1’s?
    Melbourne seemed to dominate long periods of play in the second half and this affected Hibberd’s score. Thought his first half was great with several multiple possession plays and good contests.
    Treloar gets a lot of hacked lose ball stuff, which affects his DE but I liked his game
    Trading WHE this week. He skirts a lot of plays.
    Adams was due a low score. I have Laird and Adams and watch their average score. They now have the same average to the second decimal place. Useless stat but I love
    Great write-up, Thommo. You wonder how these guys get to these lofty positions.


    1. I commented on Adams and Laird a few weeks ago as they were scoring identically then too. I’ll check the paper to try and locate Grundy’s hit-out stats.


    1. Cheers BB. Lachie Whitfield is about as intelligent as G.W. He’s sure to do something stupid again soon.


  7. Cheers Thommo. Some forgettable one-liners in there.

    I’m still getting over the Don’s tweet from the other week when he decided to share with his Twitter followers “Leaders pointed to Qatar – look!”


    1. Forgettable one-liners, Weendog? That was hurtful!

      I particular love Trump’s constant inappropriate comments about his daughter. He actually said, “… if Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her.”



      1. Haha – if it’s any consolation Al Gore came out tops for mine. Plus you’re in some seriously esteemed company.

        Yes and just yesterday POTUS was tweeting that Ivanka would be on Fox News shortly – isn’t this ‘dude’ meant to be running a country? But hey it’s entertaining stuff….


  8. Sorry to point out, but fortunately for the world Al Gore was never President.

    (he still made heaps of cash from his sucessful climate scam tho….)


    1. Yes I know, that’s why I mentioned that American Politics is a great source of entertainment rather than just Presidents. You should check out some of Dan Quayle’s quotes like: “Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child.”


      By the way, didn’t you say Brisbane would be a desert by 2012?



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