Hi Everybody!
I am pleased to announce that there is a new rule of Cowquisition! Rule Number Twenty Four: “As long as there is an Opening Round and early Byes, do not select a non-playing loophole. By the time you need one, the problem will have solved itself ”
The below seems to be true, thinking about adding it next season. Please share any thoughts in the comments.
Under consideration: “Expensive cows playing as small forwards have a hard time scoring enough points and making enough money to be worth selecting.”
Father Dougal’s Rules of Cow-quisition
Rule Number One: “Start the season with as many good cows as you can get, up to where you have undesired left-over money.”
Rule Number Two: “Good cows have good job security. A cow without job security is just an unreliable loophole.”
Rule Number Three: “The cheaper the better. Lower cost and higher profit.”
Rule Number Four: “Cow availability determines your structure; not the reverse. Select all the good cows, none of the dodgy cows, and build the rest of your team around them.”
Rule Number Five: “Money is gold, trades are oxygen, and downgrade targets are platinum. Never waste a downgrade target by starting with him on your bench.”
Rule Number Six: “There is NO rule Six!”
Rules Number Six-A: “A cow and a premium are better than two mid-pricers with the same total cost.”
Rule Number Seven: “When a cow is best 22, you pick that cow”
Rule Number Eight: “DPP is nice, but no more than nice. Definitely not enough.”
Rule Number Nine: “No matter how much you like your herd, when the teams are announced, you will have to make changes. Be ready”
Rule Number Ten: “The cows you have to pick from are the cows everyone has to pick from. Stop complaining and start planning.”
Rule Number Eleven: “Better an unknown cow than a known bum steer”
Rule Number Twelve: “A cheap cow that loses his job is a loophole. A high priced cow that loses his job is a source of funds. A mid-priced cow that loses his job is a problem.”
Rule Number Thirteen: “It’s going to go wrong. Pick the cows who will go wrong in the ways you can best cope with”
Rule Number Fourteen: “A cow that has both job security and ruck as a position is a rare gift, for he allows you another cow on field.”
Rule Number Fifteen: “Any non-premium player who has a reasonable chance of going up in price by $150,000 should be considered a cow for purposes of the rules of Cow-quisition.”
Rule Number Sixteen: “A fallen premium is not like a cow, no matter how far they have fallen, because you aren’t going to sell them to turn them into a premium.”
Rule Number Seventeen: “Cows on better teams tend to score better.”
Rule Number Eighteen: “Cows playing better teams tend to score worse.”
Rule Number Nineteen: “Know your coaches. It doesn’t matter if a cow should play, it only matters if the coach thinks he should play.”
Rule Number Twenty: “Know your teams. A cow filling in for two weeks before a gun comes back from injury is really a loophole waiting to happen.”
Rule Number Twenty One: “Sometimes you have to suck it up and downgrade to a loophole. When you do, find as cheap of one as you can.”
Rule Number Twenty Two: “Downgrading to someone who might be a loophole beats downgrading to someone you know will be a loophole.”
Rule Number Twenty Three: “Some cows aren’t worth a trade to deal with. Keep them, be patient, and hope. It’s a long season, sometimes things go right in the end.”
Rule Number Twenty Four: “As long as there is an Opening Round and early Byes, do not select a non-playing loophole. By the time you need one, the problem will have solved itself ”
Thanks for reading!
these rules should be Canon, Father D can you baptize them please?